RECLAIMING FAITH

Molly answers listener questions about faith and religion in the context of DID. Due to the topic and its content, a heavy trigger warning is listed for this episode so please skip it if you do not want to hear a discussion about God. It is not preachy or about converting, but does review our own faith history and explores the impact of abuse and isolation in organizational abuse. These issues are only referenced, not discussed in detail or in depth. Molly also shares how we came to agreement for our faith tradition, and what a faith practice can look like for a system with DID. Molly closes with by sharing a talk she will be giving tomorrow at a Women’s Faith Conference, in which she publicly discloses for the first time that she was abused as a child. There is no detail or discussion with this disclosure, but she shares it to honor the truths she is learning from the Littles about what they have endured.

Sasha talks with the husband about Easter, and he shares with her and Molly why it matters for trauma, and how it helps us keep going to therapy. It may be a triggering episode, with ritual and organizational abuse referenced but not discussed in any detail beyond an opening trigger warning. The pagan history of Easter and early church history is discussed, as well as Christian themes of the garden prayer, the death of Jesus, and the resurrection. These stories are referenced only, not told explicitly, and done in the context of why acknowledging trauma matters. The Husband and Molly discuss misinterpretations of forgiveness, and how any true forgiveness includes full acknowledgement of what was done wrong. This, then, is part of why the hard work of therapy cannot be avoided. Emma then opens up about an experience in therapy last week as she continues to become more aware of the stories of others inside.

We share insights about dissociation and therapy gained from watching one of the husband’s shows. We share about how protecting ourselves can also isolate ourselves, and about boundaries, and about safety requiring some flexibility. We discuss the experience of learning to tolerate memories, the feelings that come with them, and the questions that result. We talk about the pacing that goes with that process. Around 21 minutes, there is a trigger warning for sharing about the experience of receiving a blessing from the husband (mention of prayer and God in passing, but not in detail) - words of healing spoken to each of us individually.

Molly shares a metaphor from the New Testament that Emma has adapted to be able to think clearly and sort big feelings, so that we can make plans and decisions as a team. There is a trigger warning for the New Testament story being referenced, but only in passing to explain where Emma got the questions. Em and others react to realizing the grief that is going to be part of the experience of changing therapists due to family circumstances.

I tell you a (true) story. Trigger warning for mention of abuse and abuse dynamics, but examples only referenced in passing. No in depth discussion or detailed disclosures. Trigger warning also for mention of God.

We explain the story of one of our only two lifelong friends, who was witness to some of our experiences. We tell the husband about our experience interviewing her for therapy and maybe the podcast. Trigger warning for references to abuse and trauma from parents, teachers, and youth ministers, but no specific disclosures or details are made. Also passing reference to mother’s suicide attempt, but only in a sentence and zero details or discussion.

Our interview with The English Teacher, about our timeline and putting pieces together. Trigger warning for references to abuse, therapist trauma, and church school experiences. No detailed disclosures specifically, but trauma timeline discussed and experiences referenced (including abuse and rape).

The conversation with The English Teacher continues, as she shares what it was like being groomed by a therapist for a relationship outside of therapy. We also discuss our transition away from The Therapist over the last year. We also discuss friendship issues, and what is healthy and what is toxic. Trigger warning for mention of abuse and grooming. There is also a “cult” reference about a church, but in context of stopping the cycle (no details or any SRA or MC references, only the evangelical reference).

We close our conversation with The English Teacher with more timeline and processing. We talk about how parenting can trigger developmental trauma memories, but also how our past can help us be better parents. She also explains about her experience in a Christian “cult” and what that was like realizing she wanted out. We also talk some about switching, and how the last year impacted different parts’ access to safe people. We introduce the concept of Betrayal Trauma. Trigger warning for mention of abuse, trafficking, pornography, adoption, rape, and developmental trauma.

Molly shares an article she read. Content note and trigger warning for reference to religious abuse and scripture stories. She calls for a hard look at ourselves, reminding us we play all the roles in stories and in dreams (Jungian Therapy). She shares bits of an article that reference the Good Samaritan story, and challenges us to apply that both internally and externally in our relationships.

While not going into detail, this episode discusses religious trauma explicitly and directly. We share with the husband about receiving a message from a college friend who found the podcast. We use what she shared and what we have done in therapy thus far to piece together part of a timeline… and grieve its implications.

Our friend Kim is back to school us on relationship privacy. We process what we learned from the Seasons of Love episode. We share experiences about religious trauma in LGBT lives and how we have navigated it differently. She shares her perspective on being a supporter of a loved one with DID.

We talk with our friend from college, sharing what it was like to hear from her roommate after she came on the podcast last year. We reminisce about how we experienced college and how she experienced our DID. We begin exploring the layers of religious and relational trauma we experienced there. While no details are disclosed, trauma is referenced in the context of religious trauma, relational trauma, and child abuse. As always, please care for yourself during and after listening to the podcast.

We talk with our friend from college. We reminisce about how we experienced college and how she experienced our DID. We explore the layers of religious and relational trauma we experienced there. While no details are disclosed, trauma is referenced in the context of religious trauma, relational trauma, and child abuse. As always, please care for yourself during and after listening to the podcast.

We read emails from our friend Elle, who wrote to us after hearing the Hallelujah and Roomies episodes last year, and in preparation to coming on the podcast for her episodes. Content note: due to the nature of discussion, this episode does discuss religious trauma. As part of this, suicidal ideation and self-harm are both mentioned, but only in passing reference and without any detail or discussion. As always, care for yourself during and after listening to the podcast. Thank you.

Molly’s friend Sahar shares her story of growing up in Palestine. We talk about historical and collective trauma, and she shares what that was like for her. We talk about keeping the faith through war, adversity, and abuse. We explore what forgiveness is and isn’t, and why it matters… and how safety matters most. Content warning for reference to war trauma, though nothing gory or detailed, as well as references to faith.

We talked about the “Shiny Happy People” documentary about the religious trauma we grew up in and in which our college experiences happened.

We talk with the children about the “Leaving the Fold” book, and have a conversation about healthy family dynamics.